How I'm Coping....
I started a blog post since inauguration about ways I am managing the constant chaos going on in our political universe. I have a nice little list of things I am doing to take care of myself. It is at the bottom of this post…. But at this moment none of it is really working. It feels unnecessarily apocalyptic to say that our democracy is coming to an end, even though I have myself said such a thing. The one piece of ‘advice’ that sticks in my head no matter the day or my blood pressure is something Heather Cox Richardson said on the Politics Girl podcast. None of us know what is coming. We never know what is coming. The future is unknowable. In the best of times and the worst of times. As large brained mammals we are able to think about millions of scenarios of possible outcomes. We can spin out as far as the imagination will go. The human animal, yet is an endlessly mutable, changeable, one might say fickle being. So we cannot know what we will choose to do either as individuals, or as a nation. Full stop.
Lots of people are offering advice about how to manage this weird place we find ourselves. I have been reading a lot of it, and some of it resonates. Some of it just freaks me out. Please, keep looking till you find the words that settle your soul. They’re out there. I think this image on the right speaks to how I feel right now….
Genra shirt, Adams pants, Zakkuri cardigan
We have choices at this moment. Well, sort of. We have the general choice to have faith that we will get through this, and therefore operate from that belief. Or we can give in to despair. It is my opinion that choosing the former is necessary for our sanity, and for the health of our democracy. It does not mean that we will not feel immense psychic, and possibly physical, pain. That we will have an easy time for the next while. That we, and our nation, will not suffer great setbacks. But, we have to continue to believe in good, in right, in the moral arc of the universe. We have to stand by, and for, our beliefs. In the face of stupidity, greed, and evil, we must take a stand, and hold it. As Lyz Lenz shared in this Friday’s newsletter, many schools across the country are saying ‘fuck you, make me’ to trump’s orders. I embrace that position. Luckily for us Makers, continuing to Make, to bring joy and creativity and beauty into the world is a profound way of standing in our beliefs. The fascist/oligarch/authoritarian/republicans are fear mongers who want us to be scared and complacent and obey. They do not understand creativity. They only understand destruction and domination. They cannot fathom creating for the sake of bringing beauty and function and grace into the universe. So we just need to keep Making!
If you feel completely overwhelmed and cannot do anything beyond taking care of yourself and your loved ones right now that is completely understandable. They are doing a very good job of bombarding us with fear and danger and dominance. Now that I see it that way, I almost find it funny. Almost…. If it is too much for you, take the space and time and rest to do what you need to. As with all resistance or revolution, we can take turns. Those with the energy at any given moment to take up the cause will. You will have a turn, if you want it. But please, keep up your stitching, whatever form it may take, and in whatever limited form for now. It connects you to your humanity, your heritage, your culture, your community. Those are all critical elements of a healthy society. So keeping it alive at this moment is an act of faith, and resistance. Just by being a creative Maker, bringing beauty and good function into the universe you are upholding our existence.
There are so many parts of our experience that are currently up in the air, at least, if not upside down. How does one get through this? Some of this is uncharted territory, but if you ask any marginalized population in the States, or anywhere for that matter, you will find a sense of deja vu and fatigue. This is a familiar turn for many. If those groups can get through it, can’t we….?
Here are some of the things I am doing, and thinking, to keep myself sane and on course.
Music. I re-discovered the Penguin Cafe Orchestra recently. They were on constant repeat when I was in my 20’s. For some reason Kate Bush’s wailing really appeals. Whatever makes you hum along, play that for yourself.
Movement. I find it really REALLY helpful to get out of my head and fully into my body periodically. Pilates and Barre are giving me that space. While also making me stronger. Because I don’t know about you, but I want to be strong for whatever is coming. Not to mention wanting to stay out of the medical industrial complex as long as I can.
Kindness. For myself, and for others. The first one is hard. I Love to beat myself up. But the second one is easier, and so rewarding. Being genuinely curious and friendly with everyone you come in contact with pays off for days. Try it, I bet you’ll love it…
Education. I am done with legacy media. I am seeking out those who speak truth to power. They are out there, but you have to look a little harder. I find myself gravitating to smart sharp women, little surprise. Here are some of the ones I read/listen to regularly. (Also, put limits on how much you take in each day. It’ll all be there tomorrow….)
Leigh McGowan- Politics Girl.
Hygiene. By this I mean eating well, sleeping well, and generally taking care of my person. Cooking for myself, eating good food, making myself get in bed by 10 every night. Junk food and booze make me sad and depressed. I don’t need extra of either.
Making. Of course…. I have agency. If the world is going to come completely unglued I am going to be very well dressed, and covered in quilts. If there ever was a moment to cut into that precious fabric, skein up that dear yarn, now is it! Most of these photos are of things I’ve made in the last two-three weeks. I can tell you that whenever I feel completely freaked out, sewing or knitting calms me the fuck down at least enough to get through the moment.
This is my latest knitting project and it is quite a departure for me. There is SO MUCH more ease in this cardigan than I ever knit before. It is the Zakurri Cardigan by Noriko Ichikawa, knit in Beiroa yarn from Rosa Pomar. My hands did not like knitting with it, and honestly it was not my favorite project to make. But now that it’s done? I love it. It is the big comfy blanket-like cardigan that these stressful times call for. I need buttons, but that is not stopping me from wearing it…. The yarn bloomed Beautifully after blocking! (Upper left hand image is pre-blocking, all others post. The buttons on the bottom are most likely what I will go with, but I need one more. Sigh.
All these photos have been shot since the inauguration, so the resting bitch face is strong. I am here with you, lovely human beings. I will continue to be as open and honest about how the universe feels for me. I love this forum, but these posts take so much time to create. I will continue to be present on social media, and here! The way I see it we all need to stay connected whatever forum works. Stay human, we cannot let the assholes get us down.